Romney Says…

from TPM:

Republican Mitt Romney said Wednesday that if elected president he and his wife will not embarrass the nation by their conduct in the White House as happened in “the Clinton years.”

He went on to say that he was going to embarrass the country in a more “the last seven psychotic years of impotent old men with access to military force” style. Kind of a “fundamentalist with a secret agenda” meets “tool of corporate power thingy” he said, continuing “a sort of… you know… a nouvelle Inquisition vibe, only with talking salamanders and magic underwear as a bonus.”

“It’s going to be a whole new FLAVOR of embarrassment… that is, if anyone has any shame left to burn after Mr. Bush leaves office.” He concluded his remarks by blowing a small silver dog whistle that only angry white people can hear, and then barked “Thanks, folks…. see you at the polls!”