Further thoughts on the Deadest Guy in the Room

Let’s just say, for a moment, that, y’know, maybe he’s NOT dead. Or maybe that’s he’s totally dead, after all, but it wasn’t a steady diet of prime rib and stress that did him in. Let your mind roam free from the Lies of the Liberal Media. (ahem)

This is, I realize, full on tin-foil hat territory.

But let’s consider: The guy is awaiting sentencing for the Enron fraud. He’s also sitting on a large cache of information that the Vice President’s office wants to be kept secret. At all costs.

Am I the only one who can imagine a conversation that goes like this?

“Tell ya what, Kennyboy. You play dead, we whisk you out of the country, ba-da-bing, it all goes away. Enjoy Jamaica…”

Or how about a conversation that goes like this?

“You put this in his Diet Dr. Pepper and bammo- massive coronary, no evidence.”

You are encouraged to speculate further in the comments.

Is it irresponsible to speculate? I think it’s irresponsible NOT to.

Several other theories that have come flying at me via email and IM-
1. Last big 4th of July ecstasy and viagra blowout before going into the Joint.
2. Suicide? Meet coverup. Coverup, Suicide…. get to know each other.


  1. My first thought was “he was killed”. The whole suicide route would have been too obvious, so they went for the “unexpected massive coronary”.

  2. Khanh

    Dick Cheney had Ken Lay killed by having his doctors swap out his heart with Ken’s. (This is, if those evil @$$holes even have hearts)…

  3. Foul play regarding Mr. Lay’s timely and convenient death was my FIRST thought, literally, when I heard the news.
    Tin-foil hattery? Maybe. But after six years of the Bush Boys, it’s a natural conclusion.

  4. My very first thought was: “Oh, well, the guy didn’t deserve THAT did he?”

    Then: “Well… maybe he did…”

    Then: “Wait… what the fuck is really going on here?”

    The conspiracy that you can inject nanotechnology into someone that can give them a massive coronary with a press of a button isn’t non-existent. I’m just sayin’.

  5. Figure that his kids, who inherit his wealth apparently without the Feds getting any of it, have the most motive. If he’d stayed alive, the Feds would have gotten that dough. Now it all belongs to the kids and Momma, and the Feds can’t touch it because it doesn’t belong to someone guilty of a crime anymore. Most murders are committed by family members. Just sayin’, y’know?

    – Badtux the Detective Penguin

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